I struggled with this post title, resist the urge to rescue. I started with: when your student refuses to use a block, and what to do when a beginner takes an advanced class. But I think the same thing happens in these types of situations – we try to “rescue” the student who needs the most help. Here are some examples when I became the lifeguard and also why it feels like a relief I don’t do it anymore.
Resist the Urge to Rescue
Yoga classes are truly a wonderful experience for all skill levels. That sounds nice and inclusive, the perfect marketing. But when you’re teaching a flow class with your regulars and someone who has never tried yoga before decides to give it a go by picking your class to pop in and try, there suddenly feels like a glitch in the Matrix.
I was confidently cueing my Thursday night Vinyasa Flow into arm balances to quickly wonder if I even remembered how to cue a Downward Facing Dog again. Which seems silly, but when your class starts to catch on to yoga pose names – going back to “basics” feels like a time warp jump. Remember this wasn’t an intro class, nor a gentle class – we had been flowing together for awhile. I was given this class after it was already established, I had never cued a Downward Facing Dog on a Thursday night.
So I went into babysitting duty and was hovering over the new student to explain every single alignment while keeping my regulars holding Low Plank for 3 days. This was awkward for everyone. Your students want to flow, they will offer grace and understanding because they were once new too – but be careful you don’t turn their class into a private beginner lesson for one student. I’m sure the new student felt like they stepped on stage for a magic trick – becoming the center of attention – everyone waiting for them to disappear.
Resist the urge to rescue – I’ve learned to offer blocks before class gets going. Inform all your students to do what feels best in their body. Cue your class, without leaving your new student behind, everything can find its way to a modification. No, they probably won’t flip their dog – and really shouldn’t. However, that’s now a choice for someone who “if it’s in your regular practice” understands what to do. Chat with the student after, “how’d you like class”? They’ll notice if it was too fast, too new, etc. This is when you offer the slower flow, gentle classes, or even a private lesson. Thankfully that student tried a different class and had a great experience.
This is where your class descriptions on your website make a difference. If a class is supposed to be for all levels then you should expect all levels. If it’s an advanced Power Class, Heated, or Traditional Restorative – those words need to be clear. I get this a ton of times in my Slow Flow, it’s a Vinyasa class slowed down. Some new students are shocked and feel it’s way too hard. I’m always explaining, “Slow does not mean Easy”. Slow is a pace, not a level.
Resist the urge to rescue when a student refuses to use the blocks! Great example here, I was teaching a Yin class. The point is to relax muscles and rest on props. We find the BEGINNING of our stretch and sit in poses for 3-5 minutes. A student’s husband attended, reluctantly I might add, and refused to use the bolster for a prop. Even when we were in Half Saddle, reclined on a bolster. For my Vinyasa teachers think Reclined Hero Pose. He was shaking and struggling. I offered to place a bolster under him and he said, “I was in the Army, I can handle anything.” For 3 minutes, he continued to breathe very awkwardly puffing out exhales gasping for inhales and missed the entire point of Yin Yoga that hour. We were trying to relax into the Parasympathetic Nervous System and he decided to parachute into Fight or Flight mode.
There was no rescuing him because he didn’t want to be rescued. He also did not understand how many times I cued, “relax your muscles we don’t want to use them tonight”. He decided what was best for him was not Yin and he gave himself a uniquely different experience than the rest of the room.
Another time, oh I have a million block stories, a man was determined to touch the floor in Triangle. I encouraged the class that reaching the floor was not the goal. He was turning his shoulder, closing his chest, and even turned his wrist backwards leaning onto back toes just to reach the floor. So I grabbed him a block and set it down beside him. He still refused to use it. After class he complained to the studio owner that I “singled him out” (no one noticed, I was subtle) and he was “mortified”.
My boss had a sit down, behind closed doors chat with me about what happened. To this day, many years later, I still believe he needed a block. During our chat I was mortified I had to have this conversation with my boss. I couldn’t help but think about a drowning person, they tend to take you down under the water with them.
Facts: he needed a block. Facts: I did single him out – if you bring a block for one bring a block for all. Or ask, “would anyone like a block I’m grabbing one”. Better yet, you’re offering Triangle – suggest blocks before you get started. Don’t assume.
I was really bad at singling out poor alignment when I first started teaching. Standing beside someone to show “proper alignment”. Which is what my favorite yoga teacher used to do at her studio years ago. We talk about no comparison, but I was literally making them compare themselves to me like a side by side comparison. Offer your verbal adjustments – don’t rescue someone by forcing those adjustments on people.
Any time I walk around the room and stop to pose for everyone I ask, “Hey Judy, are you okay if I stand here”. It takes a moment but her agreement means more to me than making someone uncomfortable. We ask for consent for hands-on adjustments, we can also ask for consent when we stop, drop, and pose.
Most importantly!! I understand we want everyone to find their place, but your students need to understand how to take ownership of their body, their choices, and their yoga practice! This comes easily to teachers, we are in-tune with our bodies. Students need time to realize how they feel, what works and what doesn’t. Younger students push themselves while older students are completely content not to push themselves. We all should be encouraging everyone in the studio to take ownership of their practice.
When students take ownership we have less need to rescue them.
And if you have a stubborn old goat who doesn’t want to listen to you, smile and move on. Your idea of rescue might be someone else’s embarrassment. If you keep looking at Betty because Betty needs the most help, Betty will eventually stop showing up. She doesn’t want your eagle eye making her feel bad about her lack of experience. In that same way, we don’t need to praise Tiffany for taking every suggestion, bind, and balance pose. You’re gold star student becomes an eye roll opportunity for the rest of the class and puffing up her ego isn’t helpful.
Put down the lifeguard whistle. Your job is to instruct and lead yoga, everything is a suggestion. We offer suggestions – we don’t need to weigh ourselves down trying to rescue.
from my mat to yours ~
Stef